Breaking Free: Embracing the Real Me

My biggest regret? Learning at an early age to suppress my emotions.

Sound familiar?

I became a master of performance rather than a master of self. Instead of connecting with who I truly was, I focused on correcting myself—believing that if I showed up perfectly (or at least, what I was taught was “perfect”), I’d finally earn the love and approval of those around me.

And for some reason, their love seemed more important than my own.

The Hidden Cost of Suppressed Emotions

But here’s the truth: You can’t suppress your emotions forever. If you try, your body will express them for you—through symptoms like:

❌ Cancer
❌ Rheumatoid arthritis
❌ Restless leg syndrome
❌ High blood pressure
❌ Digestive problems
❌ Chronic pain
❌ Infections
❌ Headaches
❌ Sleep disorders
❌ Depression
❌ Anxiety
❌ Low energy
❌ Raised cortisol levels

And more.

Lucky me—I’ve experienced all of these. Because when you abandon yourself in favor of what others deem “worthy,” your body keeps the score.

Releasing the “Perfect” Version of Me

For years, my family has pointed out that I have a “Sandra” side and a “professional” side—and guess what? They love my “Sandra” side a whole lot more.

But I’ve struggled to show that side of myself publicly. It feels vulnerable and messy, especially when the fear of rejection kicks in and whispers, You’re supposed to be perfect.

But I’m done.

I’m done living life the “acceptable” way.

Lately, I’ve been on a journey of rediscovering who I am—without the weight of other people’s expectations. I’m peeling back the layers that have kept me disconnected from myself. I’m repairing my relationship with me. I’m rebuilding self-trust. I’m releasing the “Sandra” side into the world.

Because I want to be known for who I truly am.

I want to dance and play and scream and love and truly live.
I want to be funny and sarcastic and a little bit weird.
I want to show up without the masks I’ve worn for most of my life.

And it makes me sad to realize that I’ve spent 56 years of my one precious life trying to be someone I never was.